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Made in the Shade Hostaholics unanimous make it worthwhile By LARRY TUCKER Have you ever wondered what your life might be like if you hadn’t discovered hostas? That thought pops into my mind every time I buzz off to a hosta society activity. Also when I’m out speaking to a garden group about my favorite plant. But especially as I pen this column, which allows me to snap out of the rigid routine, come to my senses and clear my conscience. “Hey, hostaholic,” my inner voice whispers, “just think of all the fun and friendships you would have missed.” My cognitive skills may skip a beat periodically, but it doesn’t take much brainpower to realize that gardening relationships have made it all worthwhile. However, as a civil and social animal, I have an itch than must be scratched. Public acknowledgment is long past due for more than 10 years of “thank you” cards for the hosta society’s good deeds. So, on behalf of hostaholics anonymous, here’s a belated, sincere and collective “You’re welcome!” But first, let me confess that I’m more than a hostaholic. I’m also a pack rat. “You never throw anything away,” Shari complains. “Hold your horses,” I counter. “Someday you’ll thank me for saving this thingamajig, Look at what I did with that leftover widget.” What I stash in attic boxes, on garage shelves and in junk drawers around the house may be esoteric, but it’s essential when I really need it. That’s also my excuse as MSHS historian. My files runneth over. Hence, I have a hoard of hosta hoo-ha, including the following notes of appreciation that are begging to be shared: “Thank you for organizing a hosta society. What a fantastic beginning. I am really excited about my involvement and getting to work!” “Thank you for making me a believer. Your members are proof that the hosta lives up to its billing as the Friendship Plant.” “Just a note to let you know how much we appreciate all the work you and others have done to promote the interest and education of the hosta society.” “Thanks for finding Hosta jonesii. What a trek it has had! It’s now under our big oak tree. Maybe it will think it’s back in Korea.” “Having the sale and tour in our garden was delightful. We’re so thankful you asked us to share. It was fun to show off what we love.” “Thank you so much for speaking to our club. I cannot wait to get my squirt bottle out and douse those slugs with my new formula.” “Thank you for sharing your passion. Your enthusiasm for hostas is contagious.” “You gave us great ideas for using hostas in the landscape. Thanks to you, I’ll be using miniatures in containers, hanging baskets and small pockets in the garden.” “Thank you for your Southern hospitality . . . and you said you weren’t Martha Stewart. We know better now!” “How incredibly hospitable of you to invite so many hostaholics to breakfast after the seminar! Sometimes the people we get to know are more fun than working in the garden.” “Thank you so much for the hosta society garden tours. They are so inspiring!” “Thanks for sharing your garden and your knowledge. It’s always special to gather new gardening tips from others. You will be glad to know your little darlings (pass-alongs) have a happy new home.” “Thank you for a truly wonderful program on hostas. I have some that I am sure I have treated miserably.” “Thank you for introducing me to hostas. These things are like potato chips. I gotta have more!” “Thank you so much for dividing and moving our hostas. We’re overwhelmed at your generosity of time and labor.” “Thank you for the newsletter. We’d be lost without it.” “Thank you! My wife and I are now hostaholics. We have a big, sloping backyard and we are going to fill it with hostas!” “Thanks for your gardening tips. Here’s one for you. When I lived in Mississippi, I got rid of moles and voles after using tablespoons of red ground pepper in their holes.” “Thanks for all the hard work you and others put into MSHS. And thanks for your tips on how to discourage slugs, even if my back doesn’t want to bend over to build rings of coffee grounds around each hosta.” “Thank you so much for sharing your hostas and teaching us how to care for them. Your program was the universal favorite of all those given this year.” “Thank you for being such an enthusiastic ambassador for hostas.” “Thank you for joining our panel of speakers. Your presentation was my favorite.” “Fantastic! Thank you for the Hosta Trail article! It is greatly appreciated. Your members have done so much for Memphis Botanic Garden.” If that’s not enough to pat our backs and tickle our fancies, here’s a humbling note I received from the renowned author of the hosta bible: “Thank you for your shady confessions. Great job! Your fine book mixes teaching with humor – a first. Now my wife must put up with my giggling for a while, which might be a good thing since TV content makes one want to break out in tears.” Hosta la vista! (First published November 2009 in the Hosta Hotline, newsletter of the Mid-South Hosta Society)